Thursday, January 22, 2009

What a Difference a day can make

A wave of peace came over me today, a sense of relief. The way it feels when your body floats atop the ocean. When you can hear the sound of your loud breath, the muffled drift of the waves, and feel the peaceful sun’s rays shining on your face.

I haven’t felt this kind peace for many moons and I am rather enjoying it, for a change. I can’t say why it happened, but I hope that it will stick around for awhile and the two of us can become more acquainted.

Yesterday, I woke up early to feed Sadie, who wakes me at the crack of dawn, telling me how much she needs to go potty and then on to tell me how absolutely starving she is and then she looks at me with her big dark eyes and says she can’t wait for a decent hour, oh no she says….get up now, this is urgent! As, I walked into my kitchen wiping the morning dew from my eyes, I looked out my windows to witness the most sensational sunrise I have seen in years. The kind you see on flyers for God. The clouds are gathered, white and puffy, the purest white, yellow and pink sunbeams streaming through the middle, ejecting there magnificent beams in all directions, as if God himself was standing there, in the middle with his arms open saying “aaaaahhhhhhhh”, in a high-pitched singing tone. Despite witnessing this gorgeous sunrise, and the sheer stillness of that moment, it didn’t improve my terrible, terrible mood. Yesterday I felt as though I may explode like a rocket launching from its pad, or uncoil and strike an unyielding prey like a threatened viper. Oh, it was a terrible day.

However, this morning, when I woke, the clouds were grey, raindrops sprinkle my yard and tranquility awaited me. I woke up feeling peaceful, grateful and serene. It’s not as if God came to me yesterday and spoke profound words into my ear. I honestly couldn’t say why today was better, not just better, but honest and pure. I haven’t felt this for a long, long time. So long, I had forgotten how amazing it is. This feeling fits me like the perfect pair of jeans, the kind of jeans that your bum looks great in and there isn’t any muffin-top and when you sit down you don’t have to unbutton them to breath, “aaaaaahhhhhhh”… a high-pitched singing voice….
Maybe it was the sunrise, maybe it was Sadie’s big black eyes, maybe it was the sound of Madison’s sweet, sweet snores, maybe it's because Obama is President, or maybe it was really God coming to whisper in my ear……..but what a difference a day can make……..for that, I am grateful…..