Five Senses

I decided to make some simple changes in my life, and start doing more things that are completely selfish, indulgent, creative, challenging, fun, enjoyable, and interesting, with the purpose that these changes will expand my horizon and force me to break the daily routine of everyday living. This is a challenge for me, as I find it very easy to get into a rhythm and wind up going in circles doing the same stuff over-and-over again, and never looking out beyond the horizon or stepping over the boundaries to see what might be on the other side. One change I made is starting three classes, two photography courses, and a writer’s workshop. I feel like a fish out of water, sitting in a little chair, with a little desk attached, with my little note pad in hand, writing down every word the teacher says as if my life depends on it, in a room with a bunch of strangers. I am so out of my element and that it is a little scary, but also exhilarating. My head is being filled with new ideas and thoughts and I am having trouble keeping it organized, so, if I sound like a scatter brain, it’s because I am a right now, I can feel my brain cells firing up zipping around in there, but this is a good thing, for the moment anyway.

Writing does not come naturally to me, in fact, I have a hard time with it, and last night my class was about writing confessional style and incorporating the five senses: taste, sound, touch, smell, and sight. My task this week; write about something that fascinates me……where do I begin? Hmmmm…....too may fascinating things…I have to ponder this a little more.

Anyway, last night, while I was standing in the elevator, contemplating my own new experiences, and how uncomfortable it feels to be trying new things, I started thinking about how hard it is to be an artist and how isolating it is to be constantly coming up with new methods, mediums, words, or whatever, to communicate to the rest of the world an idea or concept that will hopefully impact a point of view, or change the way we look at the world, or experience life, or make us smile or feel something that maybe we haven’t felt in a long time, while at the same time digging deep into our own backyard and producing something so personal and private. Yet, for most artists, I imagine it is a compulsion and desire so strong, that doing anything else is simply debilitating to their soul.

I find it incredibly brave when people can expose themselves honestly and write about how they really feel or share a private experience, without regard to what someone else might think about the words left on the page, or like when you go to the theatre and see a performer who has exposed themselves so openly, that your left with a scar of shame or embarrassment because you have witnessed something so private and you wish could be that brave and throw yourself out there like that.

Anyway, I am not sure where I am going with all this, except that I wish I could be more like that, learn to expose myself and not be worried about what someone else might think. Maybe the little changes I am making will help me get there and although they may seem like baby steps, these ‘little’ changes are actually ‘big’ leaps in a new direction

This is from a magnet on my fridge - I am adopting it as my new modus operandi:

Live with intention
Walk to the edge
Listen hard
Practice wellness
Play with abandon
Laugh
Choose with no regret
Continue to learn
Appreciate your friends
Do what you love
Live as if this is all there is